Why does my cat flop over?
By Emily | February 19, 2019
There are times in my life when I feel like I have no control. You know the feeling. You look in the mirror and you see the wrinkles, the gray hair, and the flabby body. You look at your kids, and they’re starting to go off to college and you’re wondering if they’ll come home to you one day to live with you and take care of them? Your life can just be a constant downhill slide with little if any chance of recovery. The most frustrating part about that feeling of no control is you never feel like you have a choice to change that downward slide. No matter how hard you try, you’re going to feel defeated and powerless. You might not even want to get up from your desk, let alone get in the kitchen and bake a batch of cookies.
But let’s talk about cats for a minute. Why do cats always look so much happier than we do? There’s just something about the feline species that’s so positive. I was walking down the street the other day and I saw a woman and her three-year-old son and their cat in the same place. The cat was running around, playing with the dog, and I just watched in awe as the three of them laughed and played. She was clearly having a great time. I felt like a complete failure. If I could be that happy, why couldn’t I be that happy too? The cat felt like he had no need to control what was going on, and that made me feel like a loser because I wanted to control my life.
So what does this have to do with weight?
Have you ever heard someone talk about their “junk in the trunk?”
For the longest time I thought that was a weird and ugly way to say “body fat.” When I was in high school I had a guy in my English class who was fat, but what I would have said was that he was a “junky.” He had a really large “junk” in his trunk. He seemed happy all the time. He didn’t seem to have any regrets about what he was doing to his body, and I just assumed that was the way things were supposed to be. He seemed like a happy kid.
So I put all my fat on my body in my 20s. I was in my 30s when I began to see how I wasn’t a “happy fat kid.”
Here’s the thing: We are never supposed to look like a “happy fat kid.” I think about my friend, the one who said “junky” to describe a “happy fat kid.” He was never happy about being fat. I don’t think I’m happy when I look in the mirror and see all my body fat. It’s not because I feel like I’m the “fat kid” – I actually don’t care what other people think about me, and I don’t try to control my weight or my body. It’s because when I see my flabby body, or that flabby body in the mirror, I know that I’m doing something to hurt my body. I’m not saying there is nothing wrong with being fat or that I love being fat. I’m saying there’s nothing happy about it, because it hurts to be flabby and to feel like that is my life now.
Now, it is true that sometimes when we’re trying to lose weight and exercise, it can feel like we have no control. But I know that when I was able to start losing weight and feeling better about myself, it had nothing to do with my ability to control my food intake or my workouts. It was because I learned that I had the power to change my thinking. When I was fat and miserable, I had no control over my own thoughts. I was a victim, and I had to change that.
I think that with weight loss, we are all victims of our thoughts. How can we be able to take responsibility for our thoughts if we have no control over our weight? It’s like being a victim when you don’t own your body.
Here’s an example. Think about when you were a kid and you got into a fight with your sister or a brother. When you were a kid you didn’t think about what you would do if you were in your 30s. You didn’t think about whether you were going to be married or divorced. You just cared about the fight. When you were in the moment, and when you were in the middle of the fight, you felt like